Caught in the Middle: Living with Heartbreak

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i was sleeping with this girl casually. nothing serious. one day i brought her over to my place and she met my roommate. they hit it off immediately. i didnt think anything of it. but then i started noticing things. the way they looked at each other at dinner. how they'd find excuses to be in the same room. inside jokes i wasnt part of. whenever i mentioned it to my roommate he'd say i was being paranoid. that i was reading into nothing. the girl would laugh it off like i was being silly. so i convinced myself i was crazy. weeks went by like this. them getting closer. me watching it happen and doubting myself every time i brought it up. id catch them whispering and theyd stop when i walked in. id see them texting and laughing. but when i asked what was so funny, theyd say nothing. then one night i came home early. heard them in my room. on my bed. i confronted them immediately. my roommate said nothing was happening, we were just talking. the girl said i was being controlling and possessive over someone i "didnt even care about." they both made me feel crazy for being upset. i felt guilty. so i let it go. a few days later things were awkward. but then they started acting normal again. like nothing happened. and slowly they just... stopped hiding it. they'd sit together on the couch. hold hands in front of me. laugh at things i wasnt supposed to understand. and i realized i couldnt say anything because id already accepted it once. but after that night, something shifted in me. i realized i actually had real feelings for her. deep feelings. and now theyre together. im living with both of them. eating breakfast while theyre cuddling on the couch. hearing them laugh together. watching them touch. im in the living room while theyre being all couple-y. im hearing them at night through the walls. and i have to pretend im fine. like nothing is wrong. like it doesnt kill me every single day. did i fuck up by letting it go? or do i just have to suffer in silence?