✨Mr.🅱️✨

An unexpected party. A time filled with happiness.

I was very sick for several days. I had norovirus. I was in so much pain that I kept waking up over and over again. It feels like I dreamed dozens of times over those days. What’s strange is that every single dream was incredibly vivid. It felt as if I had visited another version of myself, living in a different dimension. And there, I met my mom again. I asked her to cook for me. She made me a lot of fried eggs. She said, “You need this right now.” When I woke up, I could only sit there blankly for hours, half-awake, half-asleep. I had taken sleeping pills to fall asleep. Still dazed, I got up and cooked fried eggs for myself. For the past two days, I had thrown up everything I ate. But this time, I could eat. It tasted good. It was easy to swallow, gentle on my body. Was it really just a dream? Or did I truly visit my mom in another dimension?

Sans description

Happy New Year ❤️ I hope everyone has a happy new year. And today is my birthday, once again spent together with you. Please celebrate it with me. See you soon.

I was afraid that if the medication dulled my emotions, my longing and my love might fade with it. It’s still far too soon to forget you. I will always carry you in my heart. I love you, Mom.

#2025년추억

♥️

I love you so much, my family. It’s already our second Christmas together. Let’s be happy together~ ❤ Merry Christmas 🎄🎁

My beloved sister Bella ❤ Happy birthday to you. Our relationship is special. We’ve shared so many good times and also all the difficult moments together. And I remember every single one of them. We’re still facing new challenges in our own lives, but I know we’ll overcome them together. That’s why I don’t feel as lonely as I used to. I have you by my side, and our other family members and friends too. Let’s continue to spend many more moments together in the future. I wish God’s blessings upon you, your children, and your family. Thank you always, Bella. And you know this, right? You are one of the most loving and kind people in the world.

Sans description

Hi, how have you been? I caught a really bad cold, so I took some medicine and slept all day. My place is a mess, and I haven’t even been able to wash up. Honestly, more than my body being sick, my heart has been hurting a lot lately. So tomorrow, I’m planning to finally see a psychiatrist and get help. When my mom was in the ICU, and right after she passed away, I tried so hard to stay strong and do everything even better. Because I thought that’s what she would want from me. But as time goes by, the reality is hitting me harder, and the empty space she left feels bigger and heavier. So to be honest, I haven’t been doing very well these days. Someone once said to me, “How can you still do livestreams when your mom passed away?” I can’t forget those words. The truth is… I just didn’t want to lose everything. This place—this livestream—is the only place I could come back to. So I used all the strength I had left, and tried to do everything even harder. I tried to smile more, but even smiling is difficult for me now. So… is this the version of me you wanted to see? How do you feel now that you see the me you expected? Are you satisfied? Elena kept sending me positive messages. She kept reminding me how much everyone cares about me, how much people truly like me, and that I’m never alone. That positive energy has been slowly helping me move again. Don’t worry about me—I’ll get better. It won’t take long. I really want us all to spend a warm and happy time together at the end of the year. I miss all of you. — Mr. 🅱️

me and seoul

Human beings go through countless pains in life. They’re like seasons — they return again and again in everyone’s life. What matters is how we accept those pains. I’m going to show you each of the emotions I’m experiencing right now. And as I overcome them, I want you to watch how I grow. I’m not weak. Thank you for staying with me through both my weak moments and my strong ones.

I don’t know when it started, but I can feel that I’ve become much more sensitive. And I admit that I’ve been angry at many things. I know it too—there’s something broken and damaged inside me. To be honest, ever since my mom passed away, I’ve been completely lost. There’s nothing I can do to undo it, and I wasn’t prepared to let her go. So now I’m struggling with all the regrets and emptiness she left behind, not knowing what to do with them. If I ever said something rude or made you feel bad, I’m sorry. It wasn’t intentional. Maybe I was actually angry at myself. Every time I show a side of me I don’t like, I regret it later. And I miss the version of myself that I used to be. Sometimes I’m scared that this changed version of me might make me lose something precious again… even though a part of me knows that won’t happen. That’s why I’ve decided to get professional help—to fix myself and stand up again. What matters most is my determination. The will to change. Thank you for staying with me through the good days and the bad days, for being there in every moment of my life. I’m truly grateful.